Fun With Our Sons: Age Before Beauty

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Age Before Beauty

Tonight I learned how old I am. Aaron asked if we ever went to visit baby Jesus in the manger. I told him no, that happened a long, long time ago. We were not born yet. He asked if only I had gone to see baby Jesus. I told him no, I was not born yet either. Then he said, "Oh, you must have been just a kid then. That was a loooooong time ago." I don't know what's worse: My son thinking I'm old enough to have visited baby Jesus, or him thinking my childhood was so long ago it occurred when baby Jesus was born!

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What I've Learned While Raising Boys

You know you're a Cub Scout mom when you end up teaching the salesperon which neckerchief slide goes with which age level.

The boys want to be just like dad, but they want to snuggle with mom.

Snuggling and cuddling can quickly turn into a tickling match with daddy, but mommy avoids the tickling to keep snuggling longer.

A carpeted floor always turns into a wrestling mat.

I don't care how old (or how young) you are; if you are male, you will wrestle on the carpeted floor.

I've never heard the words 'belch' and 'fart' more in my life. Nor the sound effects those words represent.

They'll carry toads and eat dog food. Hand them a toilet brush and they think it's gross.

Why mop the boys' bathroom floor when I can wait for them to do it for me? Three showers later, a towel makes a nice mop.

Courtesy flush=an adult walks by the boys' bathroom and flushes the toilet. Courtesy flushes are standard around here.

Hearing me count to 5 changes my child's behavior, if only for a moment.

I get more practice counting to 5 than I did when I was learning how to count.

Pull-ups should never go in the dryer.

Vacuuming the pull-up pieces out of the dryer at midnight is not unheard of.

Rocks, cars, coins, chapstick, crayons, army men, kleenex, and stickers are all washable, but shouldn't be.

If I want a child to be sick, give him clean sheets.

Band-aids really do make it all better.

My camera batteries will die at the worst time. Like they did at my wedding and the birth of my first son.

When I get mad at my son for spilling his drink, I'll spill mine that same day.

Just when I'm ready to sit down with my lunch, my kids need cleaned up from finishing theirs.

The game "I Spy" works great in a restaurant; not in a moving car.

Dandelion bouquets should be checked for ants before gracing my kitchen counter.

I should always accept a dandelion from my son with delight, for someday they will just be weeds in my yard.

I really do have eyes in the back of my head.

The messier the better--living room, kitchen, toy room--for it means my kids are here with me.

I never turn away a hug from my son--soon enough he won't offer them to me.

Things are always better in the morning.

I can never find the scotch tape in my kitchen drawer, but my son has at least 3 rolls in his desk.

My 5 year old can remember attending a funeral when he was 3, but he can't remember to flush the toilet or shut the front door.

I shouldn't be surprised that my 5 year old thinks I was friends with Mary, mother of Jesus, when he thinks 7 year olds are big kids.

Hiding a purchase from an inquisitive child looks like shoplifting.

The number of bathrooms in a home should equal the number of children. All 3 bathrooms have been used at the same time more than I ever would have imagined.

I'm a selfish, self-centered person. God's cure for that? My 3 blessings.

They really are little for just a little while. . .